insomnia

Sometimes, when I'm lying in bed and I can't sleep, I pretend I have superpowers.

I'd pretend I had the ability to vanish people from my life. Not from existence, mind you- but just from my life. I'd vanish you, and you, and you, and life would instantly be a lot easier to live.

I'd pretend I had the ability to read thoughts. Then life would be less complicated because I'd know what everyone really wanted from me instead of what people claim they want from me.

I'd pretend I had the ability to turn back time. If I could do things a second time around maybe I would have had the courage to have been able to fix things a long time ago.

I'd pretend I had the courage to tell people how I really feel. Be able to talk about the mess in my head instead of just bits and pieces that just confuse people. Be able to trust people unconditionally without fear of being judged.

It's sad when you lose a friend.
When you find them back, only to lose them a second time- that's just pathetic.

But that's the way life is- you can't have everything you want (like superpowers).