Calvin Klein x Macy's

Francisco Costa, Calvin Klein x Macy's

Can I just say that I really really love them shoes, and that second black dress? WANT. 

almost a year older but still struggling to move on.

Forget yourself.

Forget who you are when you are with him. Forget the unwilling relationship he had imposed on you, leave all the traces of his negativity behind you. Forget how happy he made you feel, likewise remember how stupid you felt when you believed him. Forget being forgiving, how he was the only person to have broken your trust more than enough times and yet, stick to him undeservingly so. Forget being noble, for sticking to a person who doesn’t deserve you. For thinking that maybe you both could do good in each other’s lives. Forget being idealistic, how he managed to corrupt your mind that something can overcome all trivialities: something called love (platonic or otherwise). Forget being mad and mean, a consequence of being in a place wrought out of lies.

Forget who you are when you are with him and find yourself in a place rid of any trace of him. Forget everything and start in a better place.

(Source)

i am worth it

Sometimes, new love means breaking old habits. Sometimes you find yourself more at ease in relationships defined by inconsistency, anger, irreconcilable jealousy, and neglect, simply because that is what you have grown used to over the years. You grow complacent with the misery and heartache. Most importantly, you give up on yourself. When something accessible, consistent, warm, and altogether incredible comes into the picture, sometimes the hardest step is taking a deep breath, letting go of your tattered past, and taking that risk with something new — all the while repeating to yourself, “I’m worth it, I’m worth it, I’m worth it…”


(Source)

back again

Whoa it's been exactly a month since I've been back here... time passes crazy fast. This last month has been an insanely intense whirlwind of rushing to finish the zillion final year assignments that somehow popped up alongside my procrastination to drown me together with my thesis, doing a somewhat half-fucked job and no longer caring, juggling that with full-time work as well as my side projects and I'm just glad I survived, to be honest. I have never been more sleep deprived and exhausted, but I'm also really super proud of myself for seeing it all through and not giving up on any of these things halfway.

Most importantly, my little company with D & E pulled off our first production in late April/early May and I can't quite believe we did it and it's over just like that. Sales were a little on the slow side but we got glowing reviews and most importantly, our name got out and I am so so excited for what is to come. This is just the beginning!

Full time work has been just as fulfilling, we kicked off May with 2 back to back concerts and the rest of the year looks like it's gonna be just as busy. I know of so many people who are having trouble finding work or adjusting to working life and I realise that I am so bloody lucky to have been working long enough to have had trouble with neither.

It is at times like these when I truly understand how blessed I am for the people I have around me. For tolerating all my crankiness and snappiness, for all the opportunities and support, for all the prayers I don't even know I am being covered in. Especially my very awesome cell group who constantly text and fb to ask if I'm doing good and tell me they are praying for me even when I miss cell/church because of work. Super blessed!

I know I constantly lament being lonely and not having anyone and how I hate how people move on so easily and how I slowly get phased out of people's lives or prioritized over but at the end of the day, it's not about being busy or being single, but it's about the effort you put in, and whether or not this effort is reciprocated. New friends with more love to give are bound to take the place of those who were never truly there in the first place. And friendships that I know are forever are still holding strong despite distance/time/schedules. And that's all a girl really needs.

My education may have ended, but my learning journey has just begun... and I really cannot wait. Here goes nothing :)